As an outreach to the proprietors and associates of my local retail stores, I offer this comprehensive list of special offers in which I am NOT interested: Eight free issues of Sports Illustrated Eight free issues of Entertainment Weekly Eight free issues …
From: Pathmark Customer Care <customers@pathmark.com> To: “Joshua Way” <joshway@joshway.com> Date: Fri, 10 Sep 2004 06:22:38 -0500 Subject: Re: Pathmark of Nanuet Dear Mr. Way, Thank you for contacting Pathmark Customer Care. What distinguishes us from our competitors is our unwavering commitment to …
When James Clerk Maxwell first cracked the theory of electromagnetic waves, a robot from the future appeared in his room holding a photograph of Sean Hannity. The robot warned the mathematician about the destructive powers of his new discovery. But …
Note to studio executives: Here follows a brief outline of an original screen story. A first draft screenplay is available upon request. Rob Schneider plays a reckless but insecure Kinko’s employee who is unlucky in love. One night he discovers a …
Who hasn’t read Mark Twain’s classic Tom Sawyer and thought to themselves, after closing the back cover and placing the book gently on a nearby table, “Now that was a fine work of classic American fiction, but it just felt like something …
Cinema Craptastíque: The League of Extraordinary Gentlemen Read more »
Email is to the webmaster what painful blisters are to the lumberjack. It’s an aspect of the job that’s as necessary as it is irritating. Here’s a glimpse of the webmaster’s inbox on a typical day: I wonder if every message …
There is a special kind of place where people of all ages can go to forget about their troubles and frolic the day away amidst a cavalcade of whimsy and delight. But you can’t go to Denny’s every day, so …
Attention parents and guardians:As spring approaches and gives way to summer, please be aware of a new menace to your children. Keep a keen eye out for this man: Very little is known about him, but he is recognized as being …
April Fools Day is that magical moment each year when we celebrate the birth of Matt Damon. To help you have a fun and safe time on this holiest of days, we offer these priceless gags and pranks, free of …
01 require_once(“../admiration”);02 $now = time();03 04 greet(“Dave Coulier”, date(‘l, F d, Y’, $now));0506 echo “Hello.”;07 if($Dave==”reading this letter”) {08 $I = ”grateful”;09 }10 $I = ”big fan of yours”;11 while($I==”young”) {12 $watched_OutofControl=”true”;13 }1415 @DavesBestWork = [‘Full House’, ‘Real Ghostbusters’, ‘Even Stevens …
A Programmer Writes a Fan Letter to Dave Coulier Read more »